Arthur saw a guy panhandling on the median in between Little Caesar’s Pizza and Autobell. Arthur pulled into a gas station, got out of his car, and walked over to the guy on the median. Arthur said, “Hey man, I’m Arthur. What’s your name?” The panhandler said, “James.” Arthur said, “I have something I need to chat with you about, but I don’t want to draw attention …let’s walk over to Big Al’s and talk on the patio; I’ll buy you beer.” James said, “I’ll meet you over there in 15 minutes.” Arthur said, “Great, I’ll see you over there,” and he walked over to grab a table at Big Al’s. James arrived and Arthur said, “Thanks for meeting me. I’ll get right to the point, I want to sell you a bicycle. I know you could use a bike, so here’s the deal …I got a bike dealer who can get me a quality two-wheeler that retails somewhere in the ballpark of $400, and I’m offering it to you for $50. Now, perhaps you don’t have the cash right this moment, but I pass by here every Tuesday around 4 o’clock, and I’m thinking I’ll stop-in at Big Al’s and if you’re here I’ll buy us some wings and we’ll hang-out till you got the cash for the bike.” James said, “Okay. Deal.” Arthur said, “There’s just one condition …you cannot speak a word of this to anyone.” “Why not?” James asked. “Just promise me that you won’t utter a single syllable about this to another soul.” James agreed not to tell anyone, and with that Arthur said, “I’ll see you next Tuesday,” and he paid the bill and left.
When Arthur got home his 5 year old son ran up to greet him as he was getting out of his car. Arthur hugged his son, and asked “Did you put new sheets on your bed yet?” Arthur’s son had wet the bed the night before, and his five-year-old-forgetfulness was especially potent when it came to changing his sheets. “No daddy, not yet,” his son replied. Arthur said, “Meet me in your room in 5 minutes, but don’t let anyone know; I will say ‘Hi’ to your mom and siblings, then I’ll sneak in and meet you with new sheets and a blanket and we’ll get you sorted in top secret fashion!”
After dinner that night Arthur rolled his trashcan to the end of his driveway for garbage collection the next day. Arthur noticed that his neighbor’s trashcan hadn’t been rolled to the curb yet, and in months past his neighbor had let it be known that no one was allowed to set foot on his property (Arthur’s neighbor was cranky and uptight). But Arthur had an insatiable urge to ‘heap burning coals’ on his neighbor’s head, so he grabbed some old firecrackers he’d been saving and detonated them in an old pot (Kevin McCallister style) on the South side of his neighbor’s house; and meanwhile Arthur rolled his neighbor’s trashcan to the curb on the North side of his house undetected due to the diverting noise of the pryrotechnics happening on the austral end of the premises.
The next morning Arthur woke up at 4:00 a.m. and walked 3 blocks to a friend’s house. Arthur had made a spare key to his friend’s car when he’d borrowed it one time. Arthur drove the car to Quiktrip and filled it with gas and squeegeed the windshield, and stocked the glove compartment with Snickers and Skittles; then returned his friend’s car without his friend ever knowing it was him.
Later that day, while at work, one of Arthur’s subordinates accused him of being ‘a bad boss.’ So Arthur called a meeting in the conference room, and he publicly named 5 specific and substantive examples of how he could improve as a supervisor, and then asked his team if they had any additional perspectives to share. 3 or 4 employees had some really help insights, and Arthur publicly and particularly acknowledged the ways in which he had been doing a bad job, and he sincerely asked his team to forgive him.
After the meeting, someone came up to Arthur and asked, “Did I see you talking to a homeless man in median on Albemarle Rd yesterday?” Arthur said, “No, that wasn’t me.” And Arthur went to his office to be an ever-improving, but always conspicuously imperfect, supervisor; and to sketch-out a fresh batch of ideas for good deed crimes.
#1 Timothy 1:15